2 Simple Exercises To Get To Know Yourself Better
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2 Simple Exercises To Get To Know Yourself BetterTap Into Your Own Super Powers Faster
My book, Your 3 Best Super Powers, has various exercises and meditations to tap into the ones that we all have to take charge of your life. Here are a couple of them to try.
One of my teachers once said to me years ago, "Never assume you know anyone completely. Your ideas about others are rarely accurate, so keep an open mind or you might miss something wonderful."
It has also been said, "You don't see others as how they are, but rather as how you are."
Once we imagine people to be a certain way, that is usually how we treat them, and consequently that is the behavior we draw out of them. If we imagine them to be wonderful, for us they will be. If we imagine them to be sour grapes, then we will get vinegar. They simply reflect back to us the images of themselves that we project on them, which may not be at all who they truly are.
# 1 - Imagine This: An Interesting Experiment Jump Start
Get together with one or two people you know really well.
On separate pieces of paper, list 10 things that best describe the other person or people.
At the same time, list 10 things that best describe you.
In both cases, it is important to be honest but kind so that you and your friends can trust each other and feel safe in this exercise.
This is not a "gotcha" moment in which you get to criticize or be criticized. Instead, it is an opportunity to stretch your imagination to see beyond your subjective point of view.
When you are finished, have your friends read their descriptions of themselves to you. Then have them read their descriptions of you. You do the same.
1. Do the descriptions match?
2. Does anything absolutely contradict?
3. Were there any surprises?
4. Might you be limited in how you see both others and yourself?
5. Were there any specific positive qualities either you or they mentioned that were overlooked?
6. Were there any specific differences in how you saw one another?
7. Were there any qualities either you or they saw that, once pointed out, you were able to see, whereas you didn't before?
The important thing here is not to agree or disagree with one another's perspectives, but rather to expand your own to include more than you normally see. For example, you may view a friend as cautious, but he or she describes herself as adventurous. While this may not be your experience of this person, instead of refuting this, now is the time to say, "Wow. I never saw that in you before. Tell me where and how you are adventurous because I would love to know that side of you."
Again, be aware of how you communicate. True interest comes across in your voice very differently than it does when you are being subtly challenging.
Have fun with this exercise. It is an eye-opener if you engage in it with the right spirit.
And if this goes well and you want to go deeper with the same friend or friends, you can move on to...
# 2 - Imagine This: Change The Conversation Booster
Instead of talking about the same old things you usually talk about, invite them to work their imagination muscles with you. Bring up the following questions for discussion and let your imaginations run wild together. Before you dive into the questions, make sure everyone understands that this is an invitation to imagine the possible and not a time to be pessimistic or negative, as it will ruin the fun - and defeat the purpose.
1. What inspires you most?
2. What delights you the most?
3. How wonderful can you imagine your life will be?
4. What has been your best creation to date?
5. How much positive energy can you comfortably receive?
6. What is your heart's desire right now?
7. What captures your imagination today?
8. What do you wonder about?
9. What new discovery have you made about someone you know well?
Many of my clients and students over the years have told me that it is very difficult for them to imagine positive things in their lives. Their lives have been so disappointing, so traumatic, so painful that they can't imagine anything different from what they have experienced so far.
My dear friend Julia Cameron, author of The Artist's Way, suggests that when we are trying to create something new, better, and wonderful, yet find ourselves filled with doubt and fear, we seek out generous and loving friends who will uphold, reflect, protect, and believe in our dreams for us until we start to believe in them ourselves.
It reminds me that we need support and need to allow ourselves the ability to comfortably ask for and receive it if we are to succeed in tapping into this great super power of ours.
Are you someone's "believing eyes"? Do you encourage others to imagine and believe in their dreams? Do you believe with them?
Being generous of spirit by believing in others costs no money and little time, and quickly engages your imagination in a wonderful way.
The great thing about being another's "believing eyes" is that your own imagination grows along with your generous spirit and you start to believe in your own dreams as well.
For more of these simple exercises, see my book, Your 3 Best Super Powers.