4 Times Tapping With Your Teenager Helps Tremendously
Articles Inspirational articles from Hay House authors
4 Times Tapping With Your Teenager Helps TremendouslyYou Will Both Benefit From This Simple Technique
Do you catch yourself feeling (and acting) like a teenager in some stressful adult situations? When I started using EFT tapping in 1999 to minimize my stress I quickly realized that most of my adult stress was rooted in the unresolved upsets and trauma of my teenage years. One day I was tapping about my boss who was a bully, and I realized that he reminded me of my eighth grade bully of a teacher. Around my boss, I felt like a child, minimized and insignificant; just like I felt in eighth grade. After tapping about the teacher trauma, I finally felt some peace, and I was able to deal with my bully boss as an adult and not react like a teenage girl. What a relief that was! My work stress subsided and I was able to accomplish more and be my authentic (adult) self around my boss.
In my book, The Tapping Solution for Teenage Girls: How to Stop Freaking Out and Keep Being Awesome, I talk about the “stress backpack” as a way to describe how, as children and teens, we accumulated and stored unresolved upset and stress, carrying it around constantly in our stress backpack. Right now, take a moment and think about your own stress backpack; the one you carry around as an adult, and notice how weighty it feels in this moment. Your current stress about work, health, financial concerns, worries about your children - imagine each issue as a weight in your stress backpack. How does it feel? How does your body feel when you focus attention on these stressors? It feels like too much sometimes, doesn’t it?
Now please imagine the kinds of forgotten stresses and upsets that you may have stored from your childhood and teenage years; ones that may be lurking underneath the layers of current stress. I had stored away the trauma of having a bully teacher in eighth grade and even though I never thought about him consciously, I carried those memories and feelings around with me in my stress backpack.
The brain is amazing, and so each time my boss bullied the staff, a part of my brain would reach into my backpack and remind me of that teacher who had a similar energy, manner and hostility. Unfortunately, my brain also reminded me of how I acted and reacted as a teenage girl and it was often teenage me who showed up to deal with my adult boss. Tapping was the remedy.
While I wrote this book for teenage girls, a special feature for adults is the chapter I've included to help you use any of the hundred tapping exercises now, to address your own teenage pain. I want you to use EFT tapping as a tool to relieve the burden of carrying around your unresolved teenage upsets, and get on with living your best, unfettered life.
I realize that you may already be tapping to relieve your daily stress and enhance your physical and emotional wellbeing and I’m so happy that you’re using this incredible healing tool. But if are there times when you can’t get to a feeling of peace no matter how much you tap, you may have some unresolved upsets lurking in the stress backpack that you started carrying in your teenage years.
A big reason that I want you to take some tapping time focusing on teenage upsets is because so many parents tell me that they find themselves getting triggered when their children are facing certain struggles. Here are some examples:
1) The classic – a parent being super uncomfortable in the principal’s office or teacher meetings.
2) A teenager’s heartbreak can trigger the parent’s unresolved grief over a lost relationship.
3) A child not getting invited to a party, or picked for the team, or school play, can ignite a parent’s old feelings of rejection and not feeling “good enough.”
4) A child dealing with bullying can spark the same feelings of dread in adults who were bullied.
As a result, instead of being present with your child, you may be feeling anxious, impatient, even annoyed when she talks about the struggles she’s having.
If you suspect that you may be burdened by upsets from long ago, please use the exercises in my book, The Tapping Solution for Teenage Girls to heal your own stress and anxiety. Imagine being able to pass on the gift of tapping to your teenage daughter, or a girl you care about, so she can resolve stress and upset as it happens, and not carry the burden of that heavy backpack into her adult life.