Do the heaps of plastic mistletoe, the blaring holiday tunes, and the shopping day countdowns make you cringe each December? If you have ever wished that you could hide under the bed until the holiday season was over, take heart!

What is it that makes you freeze up with fear and anxiety when the trimmings of the coming celebration begin to appear? Is there just too much work to be done to create the “perfect” holiday? Are there people you wish you didn’t have to see, much less talk to? Are you feeling the sad ghosts of past holidays coming back to remind you of all the times you didn’t get it “right”? Whatever stands between you and the joy that year-end celebrations can bring, let’s begin to heal those wounds!   

The emotional weight of the holiday season comes from inside. Part of you longs to partake in the happiness; part of you doesn’t believe it can happen. Take a close look. In this season of joy, are you extending toward yourself the love, the kindness, the forgiveness, and the acceptance that you desire and deserve? Can you see how this most important relationship with yourself may need some tender loving care this season?

Think about your inner voice. What if all your self-talk was respectful, kind, and loving? Cleanse your image of yourself on the inside and you’ll attract the respect, kindness and love that you long to hear from the outside.  Try some new holiday affirmations like: “I am a person who knows how to enjoy the beautiful moments of the season” and “I look forward with joy to the holy and healing days ahead” and “Those who care for me are close by and I feel their loving presence.”

Give some prayerful attention to the way you want to feel this December. Whatever your traditions, wrapping yourself in light and self-love will help you move into the holidays in a state of wellbeing.

Try these 5 steps toward healing your holiday fears and raising your holiday happiness quotient:

1. Take time to recharge yourself.

Isn’t this what the season is all about? If you were a bear in the northern hemisphere, you’d be blissfully hibernating right now, honoring the Creator who provided your cave and designed you for winter rest. Hibernating isn’t your nature, but you do need some alone time each day during this busy season. Go for a walk, play with a pet, take a bath, make a snow angel, write in your journal. Step away from the hustle and bustle and take time to calm your mind, body, and soul.

2.  Meditate to feel the peace.

Meditation is always an important part of a healthy lifestyle, but during the holidays, meditation becomes even more vital to your wellbeing. As a spiritual teacher and energy healer, I recommend twenty minutes twice a day, and this is the one time of year you don’t want to skip it. Trust me, you will feel calmer and happier. Expect to find peace at the heart of this season and you will!

3. Make forgiveness your gift.

See if you can visualize a fresh start with those you need to forgive, including yourself. This season for friendship and families doesn’t make hurt feelings or resentments suddenly disappear, but it does open a window for healing. Holding grudges hurts you more than the other person, so for both your sakes, give the gift of forgiveness this year. Use the techniques you’ve learned in energy medicine to approach those sticky relationships with love, and use this time to begin healing old wounds.

4. Make kindness your practice.

Do your best to add a higher level of kindness to the holiday mix. When the atmosphere is all about stress and hurry-up, you can be the voice of slow down and smile. Being kind to others isn’t just for the holidays, of course, but this is a perfect time to focus on radiating that kindness far and wide. Give up your perfect parking place at the mall, help someone carry their packages across the store, and say thank you to the clerks, wait staff, and flight attendants who may not hear those words enough during this season.

5. Remember the spirit.

The spirit of the season is light and spreading that light to the world. Take time to think about what this holiday means to you on a deeper, spiritual level. Keep your larger purpose in mind and focus on what’s really important to you. Other people will be doing the same—looking for meaning and ways to connect. This opportunity for spiritual growth, healing, and unity is for all to share. The light will find its way in with your help. Dwelling on this higher level will allow you to release the negative, embrace the positive, and rejoice in the holiday spirit!

Celebrate the holidays with The Deborah King Center! Enjoy special discounts on brand-new courses and popular healing programs from New York Times best-selling author and spiritual teacher, Deborah King.