8 Signs Your Friend Is A Drama Queen
Articles Inspirational articles from Hay House authors
8 Signs Your Friend Is A Drama QueenTrust Your Inner Warning Signals
Part of self-care is using discernment when choosing with whom you spend time. If you’ve been traumatized, you may tend to choose “safe” relationships where you’re guaranteed to be accepted . . . usually because such relationships are with people whom you don’t admire. They may be substance abusers or much further down the socioeconomic ladder than you. This relates to rescuing and trying to “fix up” people, under the guise that it’s a selfless, compassionate act.
In the past, you may have chosen friends based upon your common trauma background or dysfunctional coping styles.
Those forms of relationships are guaranteed to contain drama and emotional pain, unless you’ve both committed to working on yourselves.
You can refer to the checklist here for characteristics of drama addicts. Another almost sure-fire way to tell is to tune into your own reactions.
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Your Inner Warning Signals
Your body is innately sensitive to other people’s energies and intentions. After enduring trauma, you become even more tuned into people around you as a protective measure. However, you may ignore your inner warning signals, which you later regret.
Part of your self-care, then, is to notice—and most of all, trust, listen to, honor, and follow—your inner warning signals.
They may come to you as tightened muscles, as a feeling that something’s wrong, or as a knowingness that you can’t trust a certain person or that he or she isn’t a positive companion for you. However you receive these signals is perfect, as long as you notice and follow them.
When you’re with friends or new acquaintances, check your own inner warning signals, which will alert you that you’re with a drama-addicted person:
1. You feel bored and anxious because he or she tells the same stories repeatedly.
2. You feel used, because it’s a one-sided relationship, with you doing all the giving.
3. You have a desire to avoid the person.
4. You feel that you’re wasting your time being with him or her.
5. You have somatic reactions to being in his or her presence, such as bodily pain or illness.
6. You feel guilty like you owe the person something.
7. You feel angry at him or her and at yourself.
8. After the person leaves, you feel drained and tired.
These warning signals largely won’t be there in a healthy friendship. If one or two of the signals arise, in a healthy relationship you’ll feel comfortable facing and working through them.
If your traumatic experience has left you feeling unworthy, or afraid of people, then you’ll need to move slowly and gently with friendships. Easy does it.
Remember that it’s not the quantity of friends you have that’s important;it’s the quality of the relationships. True friendship is worth the time and energy it takes to develop.