All couples enter into a relationship or marriage with the expectation that their passion will last forever. In the beginning of any relationship it’s all very exhilarating and fun. It’s exciting getting to know each other, going out on dates, sharing small adventures and doing things out of the ordinary. But as time goes by, couples settle into the daily routine of cooking, cleaning, mowing the lawn, grocery shopping and raising the kids—and you become less of a priority to each other. Other things take over and couples forget to do things that keep the passion alive.
Like everything worth having, it takes time and attention to create a lasting relationship. You must make an effort to stay connected and keep the magic alive, because it won’t happen on its own.

Let me share with you my strategies of how to keep the flame alight in any relationship:
1. Spend some time together reminiscing. Remember how your relationship started? Your first kiss, the things you used to do together or the places you used to go? How about getting all the old photos down from the attic and having a good old belly laugh together. Reminiscing brings back all those lovely memories of bygone years.

2. Communication. It’s not just about being in the same room as each other watching TV, playing on computer or doing the ironing. Turn the TV, computer or the iron off and TALK to each other. It doesn’t have to be a deep and meaningful conversation, just talk about your day or about your plans for the weekend. Just find the time to talk to each other every day.
3. Be more affectionate. One thing my wonderful grandmother always taught me was to remember to give your partner a hello and good-bye kiss. Just a peck on the cheek before you leave for work can set your day off on the right foot and make you feel really loved.
4. Have a romantic meal. Go out for a meal, or budget forbidding, why not cook a romantic meal at home? Put some music on, turn the lights down. You could even buy a sexy game to play for afterwards! Create the opportunity to be together at least once a month.
5. Respect your partner. This is an important one. Respect your partner even when you disagree. Never belittle your partner especially when the kids or other people are around.
6. Get Physical. A sure sign that your relationship has gone off the boil is when you don’t touch each other anymore. Avoid the vicious cycle and break the routine. Make your physical relationship a priority. Hold hands in public, offer lots of hugs and kiss often.
7. Appreciation. Remember to appreciate the small things your partner does for you— such as walking the dog, cooking dinner, putting the kids to bed, doing your washing, fixing the creaky door, or just making you a cup of tea. Never take each other for granted! Why not write five things down you enjoy about your partner and get them to do the same. Then swap lists.
8. Say I love you. This one is so simple and doesn’t require any effort at all, but it has the power to radically change the mood in an instant. Say I love you and say it often!

START TODAY. As a life coach, I know without taking action, nothing will change! Only you can make the steps necessary to create a more happy and passionate relationship. Do nothing and nothing will change. So start today – what’s your first action step going to be?