I am not really a sentimental person but I am someone who appreciates the symbolic meaning of the events of our lives, among them our holidays and holy days. Thanksgiving is certainly among our most favorite holidays. This day triggers that automatic response mechanism: What am I thankful for this year? And what I am always thankful for? And who is it I should be thanking?

First on my list this year are my friends and family. The older I get, the more I value the delicate and very precious gift of life. During these past two weeks, I experienced one of those horrid scares, the nightmare of a dear friend going into the hospital, into the unknown. The days of waiting to find out how bad a condition is and what then, are dark and dim, lonely and frightening. All the good times with this person flash through your mind. The medical intuitive in me hits the madness button, not an unfamiliar place when it comes to loved ones. Finally, the report comes in and it’s good news. A couple of surgeries and a serious upgrade in health habits and this dear friend of mine will be good to go – just in time to inspire me to say, “Thank you, God, for good friends.”

I don’t know about you, but for me, friendship is serious business. It’s an investment in time, energy, years, effort, trust, creativity – the works. And I have found that as the years go by, the less I have to give to new people, but the more I have to give to my old stand-bys. I’m not that interested in seeking out new friendships. I’m more concerned with nurturing what I’ve got. And toward that end, I made a promise to myself recently. I have had it with the excuse, “I just don’t have the time.” None of us has enough time. Life goes by and we just don’t have enough time. Years go by and we haven’t found five or ten minutes to stay in touch with friends or family members who were once very dear to us. What? Five minutes to send an email – what is easier than that? (I’m talking to myself here, by the way.)

And yet we postpone these brief moments of connection and allow time to just continue to do what it does best – roll on by. Days turn into weeks and then months and then years. Life is a precious, precious gift. So when I think of this Thanksgiving, my thoughts turn to people in my life and not to the usual list of health and abundance and whatever. My thoughts turn to the real jewels in my treasure box.

And then there is family, my other jewels. I hear family stories all the time when I am in a workshop atmosphere. And some of the stories I’ve heard through the years are wild. You can’t trade your family in for the ideal mother and father, brother and sister. You have to make the best of it or go on to make the best family you can for yourself the best way you can.

Families come in all varieties. We are, by design, tribal creatures. We are a species that seeks out tribes or communities wherever we go, whether family or not. Often you weave together a blend of family and friends into a wonderful tapestry of exquisite human beings from all over the world that you end up calling, “my family.” And they are just that – your family. In my case, my family has been extended to include Brits and Australians and Texans and people from my hood who have become extremely dear to me. And then there are my friends in other places, who my very dear friend, now recovering from surgery cleverly calls, “framily” – a hybrid word blending “friend” and “family”.

So all in all, I would say that this Thanksgiving has a theme of deep appreciation for family and friends. Here are my suggestions:

1. Host a lovely Thanksgiving dinner. It doesn’t have to be big, but take the time to make it special, even if it’s only for three people. 
2. Contact five dear friends or family members you have not been in touch with and let them know they are an important part of your life. Stop waiting until a crisis happens before you wake up to the “real” values of life.
3. Have a talk with yourself about how you spend your time. Are you one of those people who are constantly saying, “I don’t have enough time”? What do you do with your time and what would you rather be doing? Reflect on the gift of time, because “time” is your most precious commodity – the time we are given for this life. We can’t afford to not fill the time we are given as consciously as we can.
4. Be thankful for the small things and the large, for the space that is filled in your life and for the space that is empty. I saw a program on astronomy in which these brilliant astronomers were discussing how “full” space really was. It is an illusion that the space in between the planets and stars and you and me is empty. It’s full and crowded and alive. What a wild and delicious thought. Seen from above, it’s filled with grace and creative potential. Live in that truth.

May God bless all of you this Thanksgiving . . . and always.