Devote at least 15 minutes each day to yourself. I consider this an essential part of an adrenal-friendly eating plan for two reasons. First, as we’ve seen, chronic stress contributes significantly to weight retention. If we’re going to lose the weight that’s gained from adrenal dysfunction, we need to address the sources of chronic stress in our lives. And if even the idea of taking 15 minutes for yourself each day fills you with anxiety or despair, then you are almost certainly living a life that is filled with chronic stress.

I know it’s hard to find even a few minutes a day to focus on yourself, especially if you have a demanding job, a family—or, most especially, both. I don’t think I did a particularly good job of balancing my needs with my family’s needs and my patients’ needs as my own children were growing up (they’re young adults now), and I see how hard this balancing act is for almost all of my patients. But I believe that if we don’t find ways to care for ourselves in the midst of our challenging lives, we’re going to have an extremely hard time restoring our health, reaching an appropriate weight, and enjoying the vigor and energy to which we are entitled.

Second, it’s when we feel worst about ourselves and our lives that many of us turn to food for comfort. These negative messages almost always come from our history—from parents who, perhaps without meaning to, communicated to us that we were fat, unattractive, or simply not lovable. Sometimes, too, food may have been used as a form of love. As a result, either we try to quiet our anxiety with food, or we turn to food when we really need something else—a hug, a peaceful moment, an expression of appreciation. Our turning to sweet and starchy foods may also result from blood sugar problems or from systemic candida, an overgrowth of yeast that can lead to sugar cravings. Low serotonin levels—involved in depression and sleep problems—may also lead to sugar cravings.

These patterns can be challenging to rewrite, but taking some time for ourselves—for what we feel like, what we want to do—can be the first step toward turning them around. Taking time for yourself might be the healthiest decision you ever make.