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Honour Your Commitments and Show Up for the World

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Honour Your Commitments and Show Up for the World

Gabby Bernstein shares some strategies to help you keep your promises
Gabrielle  Bernstein
Gabrielle Bernstein More by this author
Jan 15, 2016 at 03:00 AM

For most of my adolescence, I was very selfish and cared only about my own priorities and schedule. I rarely honoured my commitments. I couldn’t stick to a plan or show up when I said I would. Due to this poor behaviour, I ruined many relationships and lacked deep connections because I was so untrustworthy.

Upon getting sober, I chose to make up for my behaviour by honouring all my future commitments to the best of my ability. Today, many years into my sober recovery, I hold this commitment in high regard and love the feeling of showing up when I say I will.

There’s an unconscious sense of guilt that comes over anyone who doesn’t stick to plans or commitments. Whether you realize it or not, you probably don’t like yourself very much when you blow people off. This guilt can block you from deepening relationships, creating new opportunities, and enhancing your life.

And the solution couldn’t be more straightforward: All you have to do is show up when you say you will.


I understand that there are often legitimate reasons to change a plan, but when not showing up becomes the norm, it’s time to change. This exercise will help you get clear about how you’ve been dishonouring yourself and others through a lack of commitment.

Get honest with yourself about how well you stick to your commitments. Make a list of all the ways you may flake, change plans, or reorganize your life so it suits you. Then write a list of how this behaviour affects others. Finally, write down how it makes you feel.

Take a moment to look closely at your behaviour and explore it a little further. Allow yourself to look beyond the behaviour to see what might live underneath it. For in- stance, some people don’t honour their commitments or they show up late because they have a deep-seated need to be in control. In other cases, people don’t value their own commitment to themselves and therefore it’s reflected in the way they treat others.

Upon recognizing the behaviour, where it comes from, and why it’s happening, you can take the next step. Try something new. Make a plan that you know you will keep. See it through as an exercise in creating a new pattern. Sometimes the best way to clean up an old pattern is to understand where it came from and then consciously choose to do things differently.

Miracle Message:

Honour your commitments. Show up for yourself and the world. #MiraclesNow

Editor’s Note: Gabby will be teaching a workshop about how to make resolutions stick on January 22nd & 23rd 2016 in London, England. Click here to book tickets, and find out more about the event in this video:

About Author
Gabrielle  Bernstein
Gabrielle Bernstein has been labeled by the New York Times as the next-generation guru. A motivational speaker, life coach, and author, she is expanding the lexicon for the seekers of today and tomorrow. Continue reading