How Angels Eased The Pain Of Childlessness
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How Angels Eased The Pain Of ChildlessnessA Moving Account Of Angelic Help At A Difficult Time
Jenny Smedley More by this author
This story is taken from The Big Book of Angel Stories by Jenny Smedley, an anthology of accounts of real-life encounters with angels.
From an early age I was visited by an angel who told me I’d never have children of my own. As I grew up I wanted the things that most young girls want – to get married and have a family of my own. But I always remembered what the angel had told me when I was a child. It wasn’t until I met and married my husband, John, that I really started to worry about her message.
I’d only been married a short time when I had a tubular pregnancy that involved surgery. I was devastated, to say the least. But again I was visited by angels, this time telling me everything would be all right. I was told that I had a special mission in this life, which I didn’t understand at the time.
As the first couple of years of my marriage passed by I began to wonder if I really was never going to have children. When I’d been younger, the same angels who told me I wouldn’t, also told me that I’d have something to do with raising children. So I was confused.
When I married John, who has two children from his first marriage, it truly didn’t dawn on me that these were the two children I was to be involved with raising. And I continued to be visited by angels who were trying to help me let go of my goal, encouraging me to look ahead to a future without children of my own. This was very, very hard for me to do. I couldn’t fathom what else could possibly fill my life, what else I could do that would contribute something positive to life.
But all along I was being visited by many angels – spirits I had never known in this life, but who I knew loved me. I was also having difficulty with my husband’s family, who never had taken to me. Knowing that they would all be happy if I couldn’t have children made this experience all the more painful to deal with. I just couldn’t give up. By then I was investing in in-vitro treatment, my last resort. But, nothing happened.
And still angels were present in my life: walking with me, consoling me, loving me, telling me it was going to be all right. They continued to reassure me that there was something I would be able to contribute, something I’d be able to give to life, to others’ lives. You might think with all this heavenly reassurance I would be certain about the way things were meant to be and that I would be at peace with that. But I had no notion of the role I was to play. To say that I was angry and disillusioned with life would be to put it mildly. I was so unhappy. I felt betrayed by God. I felt useless as a woman.
But through all of this, I was visited by angels telling me to trust God because everything would work out. And slowly – very slowly – I made a choice to believe what they were telling me. I made a choice to trust God. And slowly I began to see the light. I began my work with the Other Side. I got older and wiser and began to realize the importance of the work I was doing, that this was my contribution. That, even without having children, I do make a difference to many children in this life here on Earth. I have a stepdaughter who is also ‘my’ daughter. She loves me and is one of my best friends. I have grandchildren, I receive Mother’s Day cards. What the angels told me is true: without having children of my own, I’m still a mother.
I never thought I could be happy without my own children, but I’m pretty close to complete peace with that. I don’t have to worry about every moment they are not in my sight. I don’t think of myself as ever being alone because I have made lifelong friends, who are as close as family to my husband and me. And doing my work and living my life as I have has shown me that children are not always what young girls’ fairy tales tell us they’re going to be. In short, the angels were right, it’s all OK.
I know how lucky I am to be able to hear the angels who surround me. But even if you can’t hear them they are there.
Read more true-life angel stories in The Big Book of Angel Stories by Jenny Smedley.