How To Conquer Your Fear Of Success
Articles Inspirational articles from Hay House authors
How To Conquer Your Fear Of SuccessBrendon Burchard Shares How to Reclaim Your Personal Freedom
Do you live in a state of constant fear, or do you choose freedom?
Some people become such slaves to fear that they constantly feel powerless, inferior, and are ready to give up. Here are some common traits of people who live in constant fear:
- They allow others to hurt them because they do not speak up for themselves.
- They quietly play it safe, never showing themselves to the world.
- These are the meek who stood to inherit the earth but never rose to claim it.
- The sullen who watched atrocities wear on without a word of defiance.
- People lose their businesses because fear stops them from changing and innovating.
- Marriages end in divorce because one or both spouses are too afraid to open up, to communicate, to be vulnerable or honest.
- It is the story of the stay-at-home mom who wants to go back to work but didn’t apply because she is letting her fear of her own worth hold her back.
- It’s the employee who wants to ask for a deserved raise but feels afraid she might be denied.
- It’s the young man who feels inspired to try out for a musical but worries what his friends will think.
- It’s the obese person too embarrassed to enter the gym even though he knows his health and very existence is on the line.
Most adults understand that they are making a choice to let fear win in any given situation. They will say “Yes. I knew I had a chance to speak up for myself or to be more courageous. But I was scared. I didn’t want to be judged or hurt, so I chose the easy route.”
Unless we face imminent physical harm like falling to our death, fear is just bad management of our mind. Declaring that we will master our fears is the first great leap toward freedom.
Fear is the human motive of aversion. Its sole aim is immediate release from threat, strain, or pain. It often becomes a by-all-means-necessary approach to controlling any given situation so that the body—but most often the ego—can feel safe and unchallenged.
Fear was given to us as a motive to avoid physical harm and death. That is it. We are the ones who have perverted it into a tool for the ego’s protection. Almost all the fear we experience today has nothing to do with physical threat.
We are afraid of being rejected, isolated, or abandoned—not of being eaten alive.
Gaining Personal Freedom in this sense is letting go of any self-doubt and self-loathing and allowing ourselves permission to be our unique, powerful, authentic selves.
Below you can listen to a clip from The Motivation Manifesto audiobook called: The Mental Projection Of Fear where I explain how to overcome these fears of change.
Questions To Ask Yourself To See If You Are Living In Fear:
1. Are your ambitions, attentions, affections, and actions truly of your own choosing?
2. Are you being your genuine self in the world and pursuing things that deeply matter to you?
3. Are you opening yourself to change and challenges so that you can stretch and grow into your full potential?
Fear Rips Us From Freedom
The self-oppressed say, “You don’t understand. I can’t chase my dreams because I might fail—I might not be good enough.” These are the debilitating thoughts of the fearful.
When someone says, “I am fearful of public speaking,” they do not mean that they are worried someone in the audience is going to attack them physically. Rather, they mean they are afraid of failure.
“I am afraid of how I will feel emotionally, and whether I will live up to my expectations of myself and the expectations of those who put me on stage. I am afraid of how I will look. I am afraid that I may not do well. I am afraid I will lose my place or draw a blank; I am afraid I will not be respected.”
“I am afraid.” The “I” is leading the way—the ego is in charge.
3 Types of People To Avoid At All Costs
There are three types of people who stoke the flames of our own negative self-talk. Recognizing these types of people will help you reject what they have to say.
1. The Worriers
We must not worry what could go wrong but rather wonder what magnificence could enter our lives when we are consistently expressing our genuine selves and pursuing our true passions. When our dreams become vivid and enliven us, we must venture forth, with or without worried family and friends.
2. The Under-Achievers
The same goes for those who speak out against the efforts and hardships required to be remarkable. They are the resigned, the miserable few who long ago gave up their power so that they might be absolved of the responsibility of living a remarkable life.
3. The Tyrants
We cannot avoid the cruel people we will encounter in life. Of all their ways to hurt us, belittling our worth is the tyrant’s most vicious weapon. “You are unworthy, stupid, inadequate, unskilled,” they tell us. This can quickly become a self-fulfilling prophesy. We mustn’t let the wicked stoke our doubts into the mighty flames of fear that consume our dreams.
While many people in our lives might seek to stoke our doubts and fears, the vast majority will seek to support us. More will seek to pull us up than push us down.
As mature and bold adults, we can refuse to shrink from those things that might cause us anxiety or hardship. We can reach toward what is always pulsing in the background, that equally powerful impulse, that sure and solid will toward Personal Freedom. We repeat over and over: “I won’t let others stoke fear in my heart. I choose to remain true to who I am and where my dreams direct me no matter the hardship I might incur.
In my book, The Motivation Manifesto, I implore you to recognize and reject your fear-based decisions and choose freedom instead.