It was early April last year when I was walking through the card section at Costco and the prettiest floral card caught my eye. I picked it up and began to read the beautiful devotion on the cover when I suddenly realized that it was a Mother’s Day card. Quickly, I returned it to the shelf, trying to block out the sad feelings that overcome me when I accept that I am no longer able to mail my mother such cards. But as I continued shopping, I could not stop thinking about the card. It was that pretty, and I thought about what it really means to send a Mother’s Day card. That is when I decided to send a card to all the women in my life who had loved me, celebrated me, and stood still for me when I needed their support.

At all ages, our women friends offer us special support and love, whether our mothers are living down the street or are no longer with us, I am surrounded by loving women. I like to think about how women lived together in biblical times, and even now all over the world, in tribes. Together, they run villages, feed and nurture the children and men, attend to the sick and more, but they do it together, offering one another emotional support that replenishes them and provides the strength to continue giving to all who depend on them.

In modern society, we are spread out, living separately in our own homes, raising our own families, but that does not mean that the bond between women is any less important. I used to worry that I gave too much time to my friends when we lived in Los Angeles. Although I was with my children the majority of the time, I would be talking with my friends, engaged in conversation while the children played. At school events, I worried that I socialized more than I paid attention to the events at hand. So when we moved to the quiet suburbs of Connecticut, I thought the isolation with my children would be good for my family. It was not. As I took care of their needs, I came to find that without the girlfriend lunches, the girlfriend walks on the beach, and the shared cups of tea, I was tired and cranky.

Once, when I was complaining to a friend that I was lonely living in Connecticut, she asked, “How could you be lonely? You are surrounded by kids and a loving husband.” I did not bother to defend myself, for I knew she had never had the experience of moving to a town devoid of close girlfriends and, therefore, could not appreciate what I was feeling. I did adjust to being in Connecticut without my friends, but I think my whole family will agree that it was not until I opened myself up to meeting new people to walk and talk and drink tea with that I returned to my whole, happy self.

Last year I sent a Mother’s Day card to a couple of special women who have always been maternal in their love to me, always making sure I am taking care of myself. I sent a card to my mother-friends of all ages to give them support and to thank them for their support. I sent one to each of my sisters, one to my mentor, and I sent one to my girlfriends who never gave birth but who were just as loving in their friendship.

Although I am not able to send my mother a card on Mother’s Day, I recognize that I am surrounded by loving women who offer me the ability to be more loving, and for that I am incredibly thankful.

We can support other women who do not have their own mothers present by mothering them with all the love that is around to share; we all have enough within us to go around to create a circle of friendship wherein our sisters feel cherished. As we give of ourselves, we receive and are replenished with love and gratitude.

• The spoken word is the greatest gift. Just say how you
  feel. Think about the joy and comfort your friends and
  family receive from your warm words.
• Handwrite a letter of appreciation. Try to include details
  about your friend’s loving nature and her gift of friendship.
• Take pictures of her garden or yours, a family pet, her
  children, a car she is proud of, a funny or memorable moment
  from your friendship. Frame them, or make greeting cards
  with the images.
• Bring over flowers for no other reason than to brighten
  her day.
• Simply make your friend a cup of tea or a sandwich and
  spend a little time sharing; these little acts of kindness
  nourish the soul, both for you and your friend.