In our book Pause Button Therapy (PBT), we share countless stories of how, by pressing the pause button on their lives, PBT users have made a real difference to both past and present outcomes, not only in their lives, but in those of others too. PBT is all about learning to pause, and taking a few seconds to think through the consequences of your proposed actions.

Everyone can benefit from the use of PBT. Who can really say, hand on heart, that there is not at least one, if not many instances in their lives, when they wish they had just stopped, pressed pause and thought for a while before making that decision, saying those words or taking that action?

It may be something simple like hastily replying to a text message, not really thinking about the consequences of pressing the ‘send’ button until it was too late, or replying sharply to your child or partner. Surely most of us have experienced the guaranteed fallout that follows.

The holiday season has the ‘knack’ of placing us under increased stress; it could just be the effect of additional financial demands, or the pressure of spending an increased amount of time in close proximity to family members. Often the stress can be down to the high level of expectation placed on us by both others and ourselves, or because for many of us, holiday time is when we remember those that are no longer with us.

But it’s the holiday season, isn’t this the time of goodwill? Should we not be enjoying the company of family and friends, of counting our blessings, of sharing and smiling?

And smiling of course is a very good example of how PBT can be used. Smiling is a signal, a non-verbal communication we send out to those around us. It requires no explanation, it conveys a message that needs no words, it demands no effort and takes only a spark of your time. Its effects, of course, can be incredible and last a lifetime.

If during the holiday season you find yourself feeling stressed, not your normal happy self, and from the expression on your face it’s clear for all to see, try using PBT, and hitting the pause button on your life, and just for a few seconds, stopping and thinking, really thinking, about the consequences of your actions, the effects of your facial expression on those around you.

How differently will your family, friends and loved ones respond if you greet them with a real genuine smile instead? Will it enhance their holiday experience and yours too?  Some may think it’s not that important, after all it’s just a facial expression; others will grasp the concept in a heartbeat. A smile can often have the near magical effect of making those around us feel safe, relaxed, happy, wanted and content. Just pause and think about it, what a priceless gift, and only you can give it.

I am constantly being asked by the media about how PBT works, who it can help, and in what ways. During the initial trials we used it with children suffering with behavioural problems, with young adults just completing custodial sentences and with people addicted to various drugs, along with many other situations. But when I think about PBT, the use I warm to the most relates to showing people both young and old, the benefit of them stopping and thinking for a few moments, and really considering, the possible life-changing effect of smiling to the stranger in the queue, to the loved one or the upset child.